Reflecting on: 2010 through 2019

These past ten years of my life saw me through my 20’s and into the start of my 30’s. It covers a wide variety of events relating both directly and indirectly to myself. It was hectic and messy. It was also, at times, fairly normal as can be for a modern 20-going-on-30-something persons life. Writing this up has been a real jog down memory lane for me. Things I’ve more or less forgotten are resurfacing to remind me of where I came from and why I’m heading in the current direction.

I feel like I could break it all down in a couple of different ways, and I don’t want to bore anyone with dry reading, but I feel like I need to keep a chronological perspective on the order of events. We’ll see where this goes.

Let’s start with a simple timeline before we get into some details.

  • 2010:
    • Unemployed
    • In college
    • working/living on the family farm
  • 2011:
    • Employed; briefly
    • Still in college
    • Still at the family farm
    • Younger brother got married
  • 2012:
    • Employed; again briefly
    • Graduated college
    • First nephew born
    • Moved twice
      • Lots of drama
  • 2013:
    • Contract employment
    • Moved into first apartment
    • Niece born
  • 2014:
    • Laid off from job
    • Had surgery
    • Started an overnight job
  • 2015:
    • Still working overnights
    • Moved in with friends
    • Worked a side gig
    • Lost a lot of weight
    • Second nephew/godson born
  • 2016:
    • Left overnights to work in an office!
    • Groomsman in a wedding
    • Gained a lot of weight
    • Moved with friend
  • 2017:
    • 2nd year of employment at current job
    • Left a group of friends
    • Major family medical issue
    • Moved, yet again.
  • 2018:
    • 3rd year of employment at current job
    • Third nephew born
    • Friends from college get married
    • Made an “Adult Level” financial decision: Car Purchase
  • 2019:
    • 4th year of employment at current job
    • Took a real vacation!
      • TwitchCon 2019
    • Another adult decision: Major dental work

Before I jump into the juicy details of each year, I want to mention that at certain points I will give more details on some subjects than others. This is because those subjects I DON’T elaborate on would require a lot more space than I feel comfortable affording here when I have so much to cover for a 10 year period.

Now, let’s dive in!

2010 and 2011 weren’t exactly exciting years. I was working and living at home on the farm, taking care of the horses, while I was attending the last couple years of college. I had a very brief stint of employment in 2011 (I had gone back to a place I had previously worked) in which I only worked one shift before being reminded of why I left that job in the first place and decided to not go back again. I was 23 and still making odd, sometimes stupid, decisions so it wasn’t a surprise to me but it probably pissed off a few people. Grand scheme of things, though, not a big deal. It was food service in a small farm town where I never intended to live/work in again.

The highlight of 2011 was my younger brother getting married and me being a groomsman. In the stifling heat of a church with no air conditioning in May.

Moving forward, I want to preface that the town I referred to a bit ago was split by a major interstate highway, and the owners of the previously mentioned food service job actually lived in another state about an hour away. They weren’t locals, so I didn’t have to worry about them.

2012 saw me still working and living in that same small town. Big surprise there. Anyways, I had graduated college (Yay! Accomplishment!) but had yet to find a job in my field. So I ended up working at the local truck stop in that little country town. Not for very long, mind you, because there was a shift in management (forced by the owners) and the new manager was anything but professional when it came to “front of house” business. As I understood it he was the truck stops accountant/IT person. He ran the books and programmed the registers, but he had no business being in charge of people. The reason I say that is because after the previous manager was fired, and he was put in charge, he turned into an asshole and I became a target. So not long after that little regime change I left.

Between graduating college and working at that truck stop a couple of things happened. The most important of which being my first nephew was born. (Yay! I’m an uncle!) The next most important things were me moving. Twice. The first time was into a house that a friend (at the time) had bought with the purpose of renovating. At some point, for reasons I won’t get into in this post, this friend “snapped” and I made the decision to move out. The decision was short notice and I had nowhere to go right away, so my brother and his wife took me in. I lived with them and my baby nephew into 2013.

During this period of living with my brother and his family, there were a couple of big things that happened. The first thing is he got me a job. The second, he politely kicked me out of his house.

It was contract work through a third party organization who basically hired people to be warm bodies at a desk for another company. We were software testers. Not on the same team, mind you, which would have been cause for concern from an HR perspective. Which is incredibly amusing to me because my younger brother had ALSO gotten our OLDER brother hired in the same way! All three of us worked at the same company doing the same thing. Except for two things. One, they were on the same team. Two, my younger brother had been ‘promoted’ to Lead Tester. Talk about awkward. In the end it wasn’t actually a big deal, though, because by this point in our lives we had all matured enough to be cool siblings.

Now, about this time you might be saying “Wait hold up…a moment ago you said he politely kicked you out of his house but go on to say all three of you were cool siblings. What gives?”

Well, him taking me in to his home in the first place was never meant to be permanent. That would just be weird. So the entire 13 month period I lived with him, I was keeping my eyes out for apartments in the city we worked in. Also, the more important factor, his family was growing. A month before I moved out of his house, and into my first apartment, my niece was born! (Yay! Uncle times two!) That’s how I ended 2013.

2014 turned out to be a pivotal year for me. I was still working under contract (it was a year long.) I turned 26, which meant I lost my health insurance coverage through my parents plan under the Obama Era rules for coverage of dependents. What makes this so important that I call it out? Two major events happened following my birthday.

The Friday of the week I turned 26 was the day we were all pulled into a hastily thrown together group meeting of all the contract workers. Our managers and supervisors from the company we worked at (but not for, big distinction) were all just as surprised as we were at this, because all of us on both sides were told that the company was ending its contract with our employer and would be phasing us out over a four month period. We were being laid off. Following this announcement we were each pulled aside and told how long we were being given. I was given the full four months, which would complete out my contract. So, big event number one? Being laid off.

Big event number two followed about two weeks later. I started to feel some excruciating pain in my right side, and after not being able to sleep (I was hoping it would subside on its own) I drove myself to the Emergency Room. It was probably around 9PM so it was low staffing hours, which is why it felt like it took forever to get seen and have tests run. They examined me and did scans, and told me it looked like I had a case of acute appendicitis and that they would operate as soon as the surgeon on call arrived.

So, that was an awesome time. Laid off, lost insurance (and didn’t realize it), needed surgery and couldn’t cover it! Had to file for COBRA coverage and work with city assistance to get things straightened out. Eventually I got it all squared away and the money handled, though, so props to me.

After all of this was over, after I had finished out my time at that job, I took some time to myself (sort of) by sitting at home looking for jobs and attempting to file for unemployment. I quickly gave up on that, because it was pain in the ass and I had found a job. Working overnights at a major retail store. Despite the back pain that would follow, this turned out to be a good thing.

Rolling from 2014 into 2015, I was busting my ass at this overnight job. I was unloading trucks, pulling pallets, and stocking shelves. I was barely making more than I did under the contract job, and still paying off my medical debt. I had recently reached out to a guy I had met in college because of a post he made on Facebook and we ended up becoming good friends. After a few months we ended up reaching the conclusion that he and his girlfriend (different one from in college) wanted to move in together and that they were willing to get a bigger apartment to accommodate me so that I would be able to pay down my medical bills faster. So that’s what we did. Long story short, 6 months into living together they broke up and he and I kept the apartment.

Some comparatively small tidbits for 2015:

I was contacted by another third party head hunter type of company to work a short side gig for a week. I also lost a LOT of weight working at the overnight job. (When I left the software testing job I weighed about 230lbs and by mid-2015 I was down to about 166lbs)

Also, no less important than the previous two, my brother and his wife had their third child! Another boy, and this time I got to be one of his godparents. So that was an interesting experience. I don’t know what it actually entails, but to my knowledge they haven’t cashed in on it yet.

Let’s see…before I leave 2015 I also want to bring up that I met some awesome people working the overnight job. Some of them I’m still friends with, others not so much. I think I even tried dating someone from that job? Not to be rude but I’m not really sure I care to recall a lot of the details on that one because it didn’t really add a LOT of value or experience. Though I did meet and make friends with a group of people through this brief flame from work, which is an important detail to note for when we move into talking about the events of 2016.

2015 ended with some anxiousness, and 2016 started with uncertainty. I had been scouted by yet another head hunter type agency to connect me with a job opportunity. This time more solidly relating to my education and career goals! So I jumped on it. Interviewed. Waited. And waited. It was bad timing because they were changing some HR policies at the time and also because of the Christmas and New Years holidays. Still, I landed the job and got back behind a desk. So started my 2016, and my eventual weight gain back up to 230lbs.

2016 saw me as a groomsman in another wedding. This time for a couple from the group of friends I mentioned I made while working the overnight stocking job. It was a beautiful wedding. Nothing extravagant or complicated, more down to earth. It was really very nice. Which is kind of sad because of what happened the following year.

2017 helped reveal more of the true nature of this group of friends. Now, I say that in the nicest way possible because they were overall really wonderful people to include me in their world. That being said though, I ended up not really belonging. Sure, I fit in with them, but I realized after a certain point that I didn’t want to STAY there in that group. They were, more or less, content with their lot in life and style. After one particular night in the early months of the year, I decided to distance myself from them. Afterwards I wasn’t sure if any of them would reach out to me to see how things were going. And they didn’t. Can’t say I blame them, either, so I won’t. I ended up just moving forward.

At some point in the first of the year, I believe my friend and I moved again. This time because he bought a house. That detail escapes me, partly because we’ve lived together for several years now and I stopped keeping track a few years ago.

The latter half of the year had a scary turn of events for my family. I’ll spare some of the details, but suffice to say we learned of a major cancer scare. My job was willing to work with me and be flexible with my time so that I could spend time with my family and taking care of things. 2017 ended on a rather stressful note.

2018 started stressful because of the events from the end of 2017, but it quickly transitioned into positive news when my third nephew was born. I was, yet again, made an uncle. Is that how that works? I think that’s how that works.

Anyways. I’m going to end this portion of the post in a similar fashion to how I started it. 2018 and 2019 were banner years for me as far as the decade goes. I maintained my job. I traveled multiple times. First in 2018 for a weekend to see my college friends get married, then again in 2019 to actually spend time with them for most of a week before traveling to San Diego for TwitchCon 2019. I also made a couple of adult financial decisions. One being that I needed a new(er) car as my old one was just that. Old, with 240k miles on it. I also needed to suck it up and get some major dental work taken care, as I mentioned in my post about reflecting on 2019 as a whole.

Well, this entry got rather long. It could most definitely be longer if I were to incorporate all the drama that took place, but I might save those for future posts. Maybe. I might just keep them to myself out of respect for the other parties involved. Either way, looking back at these past 10 years has been an interesting journey for me. I can only hope that the next 10 years are as interesting, and hopefully enjoyable.

Reflecting on: 2019

One of those things that people like to do is write about a review of sorts of the previous year of their lives. So, I guess that’s what I’m going to do as well. I’ve also seen people write up their thoughts on the decade, but I’ll do that in a different post.

Alright, 2019, what was it all about for me? I’ll keep it brief and in no particular order. Just kind of vomiting out the memories to see what I can come up with.

I turned 31, no big deal. My coworkers still give me a little grief for “being so young” despite one of them not being much older. Speaking of work, it was my fourth consecutive year of employment at this job. Longest I’ve held a job, too, so that’s something!

I took a vacation for the first time in, well, ever really. The first leg of the vacation I traveled to my old stomping grounds in Colorado and spent most of a week catching up with friends just hanging out, trying local brews and eating good food. Then I made my way to San Diego for TwitchCon. First time being in California, and it was an interesting experience. After returning home I used the last few days of my vacation to just relax from home and recuperate before going back to work.

Maybe I’ll post more details about the vacation in a separate entry, maybe I won’t. Haven’t really decided yet.

My teeth tried to kill me, so I finally opted to start the journey of dental work that needs to be done. Honestly, I should have started it properly in 2018, but oh well I can’t change that fact. It’s going to be a long road, but it’s all to better my quality of life.

One thing I did a lot of was watch various shows on streaming services. Not very productive overall, but I just wasn’t in the right mindset to create content. Hopefully I can develop the habits to compensate for that in the future. Need to create even when I’m not in the mood.

What I should do from here on out is just plan out a bunch of different things I can write about, or maybe take requests for things people want me to write my thoughts about.

Anyways, 2019 wasn’t exactly a banner year for me, but it wasn’t bad. Maybe I can make 2020 a good year by completing some of my goals. Only one way to find out!

An ice cream ramble that doesn’t end with ice cream

I was thinking I’d post this on Twitter but quickly realized how long it would get to cover everything, so instead I’m going to rant here.

Anyways, I’m supposed to be eating better (and generally speaking I have) but a couple nights ago around midnight I was craving ice cream. I hadn’t had any in quite a while so I figured why not treat myself. So my roommate and I go off to Walmart and pick up some for ourselves and our other roommate. All was good.

Last night was not good, though, for when I went to go have the rest of my ice cream and couldn’t eat it because the freezer was thawing. My ice cream was very nearly melted and my consumption of a delicious cold treat put on hold while it freezes again in the deep freeze.

After discovering that the freezer and fridge weren’t keeping temp I immediately went into Fix It Mode and started pulling things apart and cleaning the radiator fin things. In the process of doing so I accidentally broke one of the fan blades under the fridge. Now we have an angry fridge but I at least got the compressor to kick back on and temps started coming down again. Sorry roommate, I nearly broke your fridge, but then again I didn’t and probably saved you money. End rambling.

More to come

I haven’t posted anything in almost a month, and I apologize for that. I’ve been busy and caught up with work and life in general, and just haven’t sat down to write down my thoughts on a lot of things. I DID come up with an interesting short story I want to put on here, so that’s in the works. More to come!

Networking is weird

Modern professional and social networking is weird, and the internet makes it as difficult as it is easy.

The way that I interact with people changes based on my goal (and theirs, if I happen to learn it beforehand) so I often end up bouncing back and forth between introverted and extroverted social and professional habits.

My current work has taught me a lot about professionalism and networking, and the lessons I’ve learned there don’t always seem to sync up well with networking on social media. On the business professional side you have the mutual understanding that you aren’t trying to become best friends and are simply looking to work together for your common goals or interests. The other side, social media based networking, often is associated with trying to meet with people that have similar interests and hobbies and maybe become friends. At least, that’s my perception of the difference between professional networking and social media networking. The problem I run into now, though, is that social media networking and professional networking have meshed together through the Internet because that’s where the people are and businesses know that fact.

Half of the problem with them being so meshed together is that everyone is now in your business, whether you like it or not. This means both professional networking and social media networking play an important role in growth as a streamer.

One of the pieces of advice I’ve heard to grow as a streamer is you need to do at least some networking. You have to put yourself out there and talk to people “behind the scenes” of your stream. You have to make, and sometimes break, those connections to get the things you need to grow. Whether it’s sponsors or other streamers to help get your content some visibility. For myself this leads to an internal struggle between fear of the negative impact of mass perception and doing what I need to do to chase a dream.

“He’s just trying to be a leech.”

If that sentence sounds familiar, you’ve most likely read it, or something worded very similar, being used to describe a streamer on social media that’s trying to interact with a another streamer.

The other half of the problem with professional networking being meshed together with social media networking is that one is, essentially, a modern way to make friends. People often forget that fact when they start trying to network for a goal. My internal struggle is that I still see it as a way to interact with and make new friends, all while trying to make those important connections to grow my stream. And it blows. Majorly.

I’m afraid of wording something the wrong way and upsetting (and possibly losing) a friend, or being seen as a sellout by trying to get in the good graces of someone else because I want something that they have to offer as a resource for growth. I’ve mentioned it before, but sometimes sacrifices have to be made. Chances have to be taken. I only hope that if someone somehow feels like I’ve wronged them along the way that they forgive me for not wanting to miss an opportunity.

Let’s chase a dream and keep on moving forward.

Life gets busy…

The last few weeks have been sort of busy for me. Busy being lazy mostly, and I say that because of two things. The first week was filled with trying to keep up at work while being sick, only to be told I should go home and rest (which I gladly did) and also fighting that wicked cold snap we experienced at the end of January.

The second week was similar, just not as severe. Recovering from illness and dealing with the cold winter weather of South Dakota. All of this led to me taking the time to prioritize my health and limiting my focus on extra activities such as writing and streaming.

Every so often this down time is necessary beyond resting for the sake of health, though, because life gets busy and when you’re caught up in the whirlwind you can lose perspective on the things that matter. Now that I’m mostly rested up I can hopefully get back to what I want to accomplish.

See you out there folks!

Habits, continued…

I recently touched on my habits around spending and saving money, but I think now is a good time to talk about food and exercise habits.

When you take the time to learn about food and the way diet affects your lifestyle (and vice versa) you also look at the way society pushes different products and it becomes easy to see that not everything thats being pushed at us is actually good. We live such busy lives that we become more likely to choose convenience options when it comes to food and drink. We don’t prioritize getting enough physical activity during the day and wind up leading sedentary lives. All of this can be considered true when you look at the average gamer, and especially true when you stop to consider the activity of streaming.

After taking some time to think through all of this I realized I need to take a better stance on my own personal health in regards to eating and exercise habits. So, I’ve taken all of the information I have already, grabbing more from research, and I’ve decided that there’s no better time than now to make changes. I’ll spare you all of the nitty gritty details of how I got to this point, but I’m going to work on improving my eating and exercise habits. The ultimate goal will be to lose weight, building a little bit of muscle and strength along the way, but it will not be a short journey or a temporary change.

I probably won’t communicate a lot of progress on this journey, but if I do have tidbits to share they’ll likely be over on my Twitter account.

Stay awesome, and stay healthy.

Changing hobbies and habits

The last few years have seen me spend more time and money than I’d like to admit on certain hobbies and habits.

On the hobby side, I spent a lot of time and money on Magic: The Gathering. My favorite format being Commander/EDH made it more to try and purchase older cards that would end up sometimes being fairly expensive. I also used to play with a fairly large local group who shared the same enthusiasm for the game, but times have changed. While I still greatly enjoy the game, I don’t play it near often enough and as such don’t purchase cards hardly at all.

I’ve since replaced that hobby with streaming. Mostly because for me it’s just an extension of my existing hobby of playing video games. Oddly enough, I’ve probably invested just as much time and money into streaming that I did for Magic. So really, I could just go either way on a whim and not be too upset. However, I don’t want to feel like I’ve wasted all the time and effort I’ve put into streaming.

Let’s jump over to habits. It should be apparent based on the above hobbies that I wasn’t always the best with money. That really needs to change. I’ve done the paycheck to paycheck lifestyle before, and it isn’t fun. Now, although I don’t really live like that anymore, I do need to focus on saving money. I also need to focus on my health, and the two kind of go hand in hand.

If I spend more wisely on things, then I should be spending time on eating healthier and working out. I need to get back to the gym instead of letting my membership go to waste.

But to do the above I need to work on my habits. Need to find ways to be accountable to myself more than anything, and that’s a struggle I’ve always dealt with.

So here’s to hobbies that won’t hold me back, and building habits that will help me improve. Cheers!